After a series of conversations with myriad people about success, working, and getting things done…I’ve come to realize how trapped many of us are in the notion that being obsessive and over working is somehow admirable. Watching people I know skip sleep and take pride in “working” all night or doing more and more, makes me want to take a break for them. 

It’s not that I don’t work, nor is it that my super productive friends aren’t doing well, but more so, that I have always known deep inside that our quality of life is suffering greatly because of these conditions. 

I listened to someone say their only fear was lost potential, and lived by a “by any means necessary” motto. It leads to someone who falls asleep in meetings, has extreme lifestyle habits, and forgets themselves and our delicate body homeostasis in lieu of some “greater good” that comes from all the work. I have to wonder what they value, and if those values exist in anything real, sustainable, and long lasting?

I also have to wonder what deep issues might be humming below these needs to do more. People who do things “by any means” can easily lose sight of their own needs, their integrity, and their ability to have actual choice in things when in this mindset. They lose sight of being human, and ill placed guilt or shame can develop. 

So I wonder if the people we look up to or our peers, who are “successful” are driven by compassion and balance or if it is something deeper? Are they actually happy? Do they know they could be happy? I’m not sure if the basis of success stems from proving others wrong or one-upping others, or from managing feeling of inadequacy. Or if it comes from purpose, and a genuine desire with just a slight to their own needs at times. 

All we have is a precious amount of time here in our earthly bodies, doing the best we can to “live well” and for many, live a life that matters. Sad are those who care about accomplishments and paychecks rather than the quality of the heart, how deeply they loved, or how they made those around them feel. 

It’s not about time or energy, but about purpose. Where is your purpose, and where is the strategy that creates an efficient way of navigating life, feeling enough, and that leaves time to just be? 

Yes, space to be. 

Space to be a human being, and not a human doing. Space to laugh and cry and do ridiculous things solely because you like them. Space to see nature, architecture and art; space to be as successful as you’d like. Space to dream, and write, and read books, or just stare into that very space. 

So I think it opens a place where we can all question ourselves and our motives. I’ve mentioned before the importance of Why, but also what are your motivations, what are the costs and benefits of what you are doing, how do those actions tie into your concept of success, and are your ideas of success even your own? 

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